How to Reach Enlightenment?
Reaching enlightenment is not about acquiring knowledge, positive experiences, or trying to achieve a “transformation” of your soul or spirit. Instead, it is reached through a systematic process of removal—specifically, the dismantling of unfounded “stories” (such as “ego” and “should” stories) through a series of realizations.
The primary tool for walking this path is the practice of authenticity. This practice involves three core steps:
1. Never lie to yourself You must face your true feelings and motivations honestly. If you are angry, selfish, or seeking validation, do not try to convince yourself otherwise. Lying to yourself prevents the very introspection needed to uncover your hidden stories.
2. Observe only, and without judging Do not interfere with your thoughts or actions, but simply observe them. Because it is difficult not to judge, the goal is simply to notice when you start judging. When you catch yourself making a judgment, immediately shift your focus to observing the judgment itself and ask:
“What is the belief or ‘story’ behind this judgment?”
“Why do I believe that story?” When you identify the underlying story and realize it contains contradictions or does not match reality, the story will collapse on its own, taking the judgment with it.
3. Don’t use effort to force change The standard self-improvement model tells you to force yourself to change, but forcing change is just pretending. If you force yourself to act calm when you are angry, you are simply an angry person pretending to be calm. Pretending prevents you from deeply questioning why you are angry in the first place, which blocks the possibility of a true realization. Real change only happens naturally and permanently when a realization occurs.
The Right Way to Use Effort
While you should never use effort to force a change in your personality, effort is required for the following:
Building the habits of not lying to yourself, observing without judging, and doing deep introspection.
Practicing restraint, which means using willpower to ensure your genuine, deliberate intentions (”wants”) prevail over inherited, unconscious impulses (”desires”).
Embrace Triggers in Everyday Life
To reach enlightenment, you must avoid isolating yourself in retreats or trying to anesthetize yourself from negative emotions. “Enlightenment” achieved in a peaceful, artificial environment is an illusion that shatters the moment you return to reality and someone bumps into you.
Instead, true enlightenment requires full participation in the chaos of everyday life. The conflicts you have with your boss, spouse, or strangers provide the essential “triggers” you need. Without these triggers provoking your reactions, you would never have the opportunity to engage in introspection and uncover the hidden stories operating in your mind.
Maintain Constant Skepticism
Finally, the path requires a constant attitude of skepticism. You must be willing to question everything, especially your own progress. If you ever become so attached to the idea that you are “enlightened” that you refuse to question it, you have simply traded your everyday ego for a “spiritual ego” and turned your beliefs into dogma. A truly enlightened person understands their perception is limited and remains entirely open to questioning their own enlightenment at any time.